We drive just 35 kilometers to another time, another place, another world within us.
San Javier is a town of just 150 people, though we see only a few along the stone streets, standing in the shade of lime trees, in the doorways of homes and small cafes with tables and chairs beneath thatch roofs.
It is the church we have come to see. Maybe it is the oldest, the tallest, the most beautiful, the most something of somethings that I can't recall. The details rarely matter.
At the entry, a man with a soft voice and gentle smile ushers us in. The church was built in 1699, he says. We are alone here, nodding in awe and repeating his words in whispers.
I am not looking for god. But time holds reverence and attention is the currency of care.
He shows us all the places god would live: the diminutive wood closet for confession, the baptism basin made of smooth marble remarkably unblemished after hundreds of years. The oil paintings above the altar, dark with time, with repetitive prayers. He pauses at each square of art, points one-by-one to say the name. I do not know these saints, these ways of adoration, but I nod along, feign a following I wish to feel.
I am not looking for god — or I am, by default, always searching for something. It’s more that I am seeing beauty in the details: thick walls that cool our weariness, the solace of hushed words, the way the man mixes both Spanish and English and when I comment on his skills — how did you learn English, I ask — his smile is soft as he points to his ear, “escuchar,” he says.
After three months of Spanish lessons, this is one of the handful of words I know (and love): escuchar, to listen.
Even saying the word produces a lovely soft sound: ehs - koo - chahr
Hear the beauty of the word, here.
This church, this gentle man with four generations planted in this remote desert place, shows us every small thing we need to know.
Later in the day, after hours of oven heat, the world feels loud and full, bustling and busy. I head to the sea. I long to cool off but mostly I wish to slip into a long pull of plunging quiet.
The next day I wake early to an orange sky that turns the morning pink. The roosters have already begun their announcements, followed by dogs, by birds, by cars, by the crackles of day. The day barges and enlarges, and I listen for the hush.
Escuchar, escuchar, escuchar.